…halp?

So, for this fine year I got easily the worst birthday present I’ve ever gotten in my life. It was a day late, but that’s not much consolation.

On 11 January, I became homeless.

Proper homeless.

Not staying over with friends or family.

Not couch-surfing.

Not living with a boyfriend or an ex-boyfriend but not on the lease or mortgage.

Actually sleeping in my fucking car.

There’s a long story behind it and I fucked up a lot but basically, the killing blow involved management at the extended-stay motel I was living in finding out that I had bed bugs in my room. It was a mild infestation and I was gearing up to knock it out, but I left the bug spray I’d been using out on my bedside table and they came in for a safety check. Busted. I had been afraid they’d kick me out if I told them about it. I was right. No alternative arrangements, no nothing. Just gone. They were nice enough to let me finish out my last week, at least, but if I go back they’ll be charging me more (my rate was possibly the lowest in the building because I’d been there almost a year), plus I’d owe hotel tax again for a month. And I wasn’t going to be allowed back for three weeks as it was, if I wanted to keep that specific room.

And I had wanted to get out of there anyway, but I hadn’t anticipated it happening like that. I expected to have more preparation time. Oops.

The good news is that I can still earn. The problem there is that I’m using my car to do it and I have already beaten the shit out of that poor thing in the past year. It turns ten years old this year and hit 100k miles last fall. It needs its front right outer tie rod end replaced, it needs its injection system properly cleaned, and I may be looking at suspension work in the near future, too. So I don’t know how much longer I’ll actually be able to depend on it, and I’m not driving it as much as I ought to in order to get myself out of this mess.

I need a normal job, at least for a little while (I would much prefer to be self-employed but that’s not realistic yet), but when I left my daughter’s father’s household two Septembers ago I was woefully unprepared to make it on my own. My wardrobe is shit, for starters. So I have to work on that too.

I’ve also been eating like shit and it’s worse now since I have no way to store perishable food in my car. And this was without the recent price spikes in damn near everything edible.

So why the “halp”? Well. I don’t want to do this, but I just want to make it through the next little while and every little bit would be helpful. So if anyone by some miracle has got some pocket change burning a hole in it out there and wouldn’t mind passing it on, I would be very grateful. I will offer some options on this page for that, and with some of them you would at least not be giving something for nothing in return.

Direct (or almost) monetary help:

1. PayPalMe: I hate PayPal and meant to close the account, but I still have it for now, so.

2. I don’t know if you have ever heard of Chime, but I use them as my primary banking these days. If you already have a bank you like, they could serve as your internet spending account, that way your primary account’s less likely to be hacked. I love them. No monthly fees, no minimum deposit, and their SpotMe has saved my ass more than once in the past year and a half.

Click here to join via my referral link. When your account receives a qualifying direct deposit of $200 or more, we’ll each receive $100. FYI, I don’t know if you’ve ever done a split direct deposit at work, but most employers allow that.

That will take a while to kick in, though that’s the bit where you also get something out of it. For more immediate one-way help, my ChimeSign is $Dana-Seilhan.

If you are already on Chime, I could use another SpotMe boost (use my ChimeSign). Once you’ve boosted me, I can send you one back in February. I sent all mine out for January but one didn’t boost back. I don’t routinely overdraft my account, but that extra $40 (if fully boosted) would put a good bit of gas in my tank if I ran out of money.

NOTE: I don’t have Venmo, which is PayPal anyway. Never tried CashApp. Might in the future, haven’t decided yet.

3. If feminist politics is your jam and you’re tired of mainstream “feminist” bullshit, I just started a Substack. I am a fucking flake, and I can’t see myself getting very far with that, but you never know. You can read it for free. If you want to hang out in the comment section, that’s $5 a month or $50 a year. I don’t think I need to tell you which I’d prefer. A monthly deposit would not hurt my feelings at all.

4. Am trying to raise direct help about the tie rod work on my car specifically. Look here.

For sale:

1. BigStock Photo: I don’t have a whole lot here, and last year I sold my DSLR and my current phone camera is shit, so it’s not likely I will add in anything new anytime soon. I may add some old things as I find them, but I need to take the time to sort through my stuff. Meanwhile, there you go. I cannot fathom anyone will want anything there, but sometimes people surprise me.

2. My Etsy shop: At one point recently I had a couple items here. I removed them because I want to tweak the one item and the other item is in my storage locker. I don’t want a sale coming through on the storage-locker item only for me to be delayed going to pick it up. My goal is to start doing some art trading cards and stick them in this shop. And if you know how to contact me, please do offer suggestions for subject matter. One of the obstacles to my becoming a working artist, ever, is that I’m slow; another is that I sit down to draw and then I draw a blank on WHAT to draw. Argh. So, yeah. Ideas would be good.

3. eBay listings: At the time this page goes live, that eBay link has no listings on it. But if you want to see if I’m listing anything, that’s where you go. I do have some things I want to sell but I’m just not ready to set them up yet. One of them’s an ’80s-era Cabbage Patch Kid, but I want to see if I still have her adoption certificate somewhere first. I also have a whole shedload of Doctor Who stuff. Haven’t stopped being a fan, just have no place to put any of it and won’t care about it being gone later. I only had two collectibles from that show that I cared about and I’ve lost them (this was before I moved out two Septembers ago), so the rest is just noise, really.

I had said at one point that you would pry my Rory McCann/ The Hound collectible stuff from my cold, dead hands unless I hit really hard times. I’m almost there, I think, but I’m holding out for as long as I can. But if I hit that point, eBay’s where you’ll find that stuff.

Information:

I am looking for two things.

1. A job on a bus line that services the High Street corridor. Preferably no more than fifteen minutes to Clintonville by car. Minimum pay rate $16 an hour, and full-time. I am very flexible on hours as long as my car runs, but if it dies on me then hours will need to coincide with COTA hours, at least until I figure out how expensive Ubering would be.

2. An apartment. I would be completely fine with a studio as long as it had a full kitchen and its own bathroom and NO BED BUGS. (Strangely, I don’t think I brought any with me when I moved out of that motel suite.) We’re talking lease and the whole bit. Bonus if they are not charging a deposit. I cannot get one right now, so it not being available now is fine — three months down the road, say? Maybe when the students are moving out and going home? I can walk, so stairs are fine. Someone’s mother-in-law apartment above a garage would be perfect, but I’m not that picky. Extra special bonus if it’s hardwired for cable. (If I could get an at-home job doing customer support, that would be the Holy goddamn Grail. Don’t tell Prospective Landlord I said goddamn. Thanks.) I also need air conditioning — central would be my Powerball win, but a window or wall unit is fine. Long as I don’t have to pay three hundred fucking bucks to not die of heat stroke this summer. I have a feeling it’ll be a muhfugger.

Some notes of potential interest to a landlord: I have no evictions, no kids (with me… both are grown), no partner, do not smoke, don’t “420,” have no pets and no intention of getting any for at least the next couple years, and have no criminal record. Or inclinations, while we’re at it. My most recent lease ended in mid-2009. I don’t even know if they still have me in their records but it’s a Clintonville property.

Some of you are local, know me, and could potentially inform me of these things if I don’t find them on my own, the apartment in particular. You know where I am. I’d be awfully happy to hear from you, and not just for the information. Come on now, I’m homeless, not dead.

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Last updated: 02 February 2023